Sannyas is to live in
utmost insecurity... but the moment you start living in ut-most insecurity, all
insecurity disappears. Then you are secure for the first time.
Why does it happen?
The moment you accept
insecurity, you stop asking for security. The moment you understand that insecurity
is the nature of life, the moment you see that asking for security is asking
for death... a secure person is a dead person. If you are alive you will have
to live in insecurity.
Life is insecure, rooted
in insecurity. One day you will have to die – how can you be secure? And you
love a woman, and the woman is still alive – she can fall in love with somebody
else. Nobody knows the ways of life – they are mysterious. And she is still
alive; she is not dead. You can trust only a dead woman or a dead man.
That’s why, the moment
people fall in love they start killing each other – to create security. If you
have killed the woman she
becomes a wife; if you have killed the man he becomes a husband. Now you can be
secure. There is security with a husband, but no life; and there is security
with a wife, but no life. You have killed her so much that she cannot fall in
love again. But remember: she cannot fall in love with anybody else – she
cannot fall in love with you either. You have destroyed love.
You catch hold of a bird,
and you had loved see-ing it flying in the sky, it was so beautiful – it was freedom
on wings. Now you are afraid: the bird may fly again. So you cut the wings and
put him in a beautiful cage. Do you think it is the same bird that you had seen
in the sky on the wing, whispering with the clouds? Do you think it is the same
bird? It is a corpse, although it breathes. And it will never give you that
joy.
That joy was not only
because of the bird – many many things were involved in it... the open sky, the
clouds, the sun, the wind. The FREEDOM was implied there! Now you have
destroyed freedom, you have taken the sky away; you have taken the bird out of
the WHOLE context. Now it has no meaning any more.
You see a beautiful
flower on the rosebush and you cut it and you bring it home, and you put it on your
table in a flowerpot – but it is no more the same flower. You have kiLled it!
It is dying. And you will never see THAT beauty – because the juice was
flowing, the flower was rooted in the earth.
The earth was nourishing
it and the sun was nourishing it and the wind was playing with it, and the fragrance
was there... and all! You have taken it out of context. Now, in your plastic
flowerpot you have encaged this beautiful flower, but it is dead.
That’s what we go on doing.... You love a woman, and she was
so alive – that’s why! She was pure life. She was joy, she was dance, a song,
and you had fallen in love with ALL those things together. Then you make a
prisoner of her. You go to the court, you make legal conditions on her –you
reduce her from the woman to a wife. This is an ugly pheno-menon: to reduce any
woman to a wife, to reduce any man to a husband. You have taken away ALL that
was beautiful and glorious, all that was divine. And now you are stuck with the
woman and you wonder what has happened. Now you don’t feel so much joy in her
being. Now being with her is tedium, a boredom. Have you not seen husbands and
wives sitting together, how bored they look – utterly bored? If a friend comes
or a neighbour, they start becoming a little alive; otherwise, they are utterly
bored... looking into each other and finding nothing. They both have killed
each other! And, naturally, they are angry too, because how can you forgive your
murderer? You cannot.
The idea of security
brings death in life. Afraid you may catch cold, you don’t go into the rains.
Afraid you may harm your body, you don’t go to the playground. Afraid that you
may fall from the tree, you don’t climb. Afraid that death may happen, you
don’t go to the mountains. Afraid, afraid, afraid... you go on withdrawing
yourself from life.
A moment comes – you are
there but all life has disappeared. Then you are secure, but at what
cost? And the more you
make yourself secure, the more fear arises.
Have you not seen it?
Poor people are less afraid than rich people – naturally, because they have much
to lose, so more fear of insecurity. A rich man feels more insecure, because
communism can come. What does a beggar bother about communism? He says, ”Okay,
let communism be! It doesn’t matter.” The rich man is always afraid the bank
may fail, the business may fail... this may happen, that may happen. He is
continuously worried.
It is not accidental that
the rich man cannot sleep; the rich man suffers from insomnia. It is very rare to
find a beggar suffering from insomnia; I have not found. I have been searching
for a beggar who suffers from insomnia – I have not found. That is the rich
man’s disease. The beggar has nothing to worry about! He has nothing to LOSE!
The rich man has a thousand and one things to worry about.
He goes to bed, but the
mind goes on spinning, weaving; it goes on working – a thousand and one things
have to be settled, arranged, planned. Something may go wrong – how can he
sleep? How can he afford sleep? A rich man is so poor, he cannot afford sleep;
only a poor man is so rich that he can afford sleep.
Just watch how life
functions: the more secure you become, the more afraid, frightened. And when you
are more afraid, you want more security. When you have more security, you
become more afraid... it is a vicious circle.
That’s why I say sannyas
is to live in utmost in-security.
What do I mean by saying
it? I mean that insecurity is life. There is no life without insecurity. That
is the BEAUTY of life! that all can be lost. Hence the joy of the game. If it
is certain that you will win, what will be the joy of it? If winning is
certain, abso-lutely certain7 there cannot be any joy in it. The more uncertain
the victory is, the more joy, the more search for it.
Life is insecure. This,
when understood deeply, brings a kind of security – then you are no more
afraid. Life is insecure!
You know perfectly well you have fallen in love with this woman and this
woman can still fall in
love, because she will still breathe, she will still be alive. Who knows about tomorrow?
You are not the only man in the world. What foolish-ness to think that this
woman cannot fall in love with anybody else! She CAN fall! And because she can
fall, love her intensely – because who knows about tomorrow? Tomorrow she may
go and may not turn again and may not see you again. This may be your last time
– make as much of it as you can.
This is the understanding
of sannyas, that tomorrow is not certain, only this moment is my moment – I
have to live it in totality.
And I am not saying that
she WILL leave you, or she has to leave you. In fact, if you love her totally in
this moment, how can she leave you? If you have loved her so much, how can she
leave you?
Out of today will come
tomorrow. Out of this moment will follow the next. If this moment has been of such
ecstasy, how can she leave you? Out of insecurity, security is born – she
cannot leave you. It is impossible to leave you – not because of the law and
the court and the marriage and the society, but just because you loved her so
much.
You have given her the
first insight into no-time, no-mind. You have been a door to the divine – -how can
she leave you? She has already become part of you; you have become part of her.
But this is happening of its own; it is unmanaged. Out of insecurity you loved
her totally, and out of total love life becomes secure.
So, Bharti, you are right
– what I say is true, what you feel is true too. Sannyas is uttermost insecurity,
and once you are a sannyasin you start having a new vision of life. And that
new vision KNOWS NOTHING OF INSECURITY.
From the book: Walk Without Feet, Fly Without Wings and Think Without
Mind
by Osho
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