Wednesday, February 6, 2013

How do you fall in love that lasts forever?


Being in love can improve the quality of your life in all areas. It can reduce stress, increase happiness and, sometimes, give you a reason to get up in the morning. But when love falls apart, it can have the opposite effect. So how do you fall in love that lasts forever, and have the type of love that makes it through thick and thin?
The truth is that love doesn’t always just live happily ever after. There are going to be some hard times inside any relationship, and how you handle those hard times determines how long your love will last. Following are some tips to help you see your partner through loving eyes no matter what happens and, therefore, keep the love bond strong forever.
1. Recognize, and Cherish, Your Differences
Nobody in this world is going to be quite like you. Your partner may have different habits, beliefs, goals and dreams in life. The funny thing is that most people cherish these differences in the beginning of the relationship but start to be annoyed with them later on in the relationship, and then issues start to occur because one person feels more right than the other does.
It is important to recognize that your partner is living their own life at the same time that they are in a relationship with you. If you do this, and let them be themselves, then you will always love the uniqueness about your partner instead of being mad about it.
It will also allow you to see why your partner does what they do instead of wanting them to do it differently. For example, if your partner deals with grief in a different way than you do, then recognizing that they are grieving the only way they can will help you to avoid getting angry or hurt towards them after a death or loss occurs. Not only will you avoid feeling negative towards them, but you will avoid strain in the relationship as well during a time that you both need each other.
2. Don’t Live With Expectations
When your expectations are not fulfilled in a relationship, then problems always occur. If you expect your partner to love you in a certain way, instead of allowing them to love you in their own way, then you will surely be disappointed. However, if you let them love you in their own way then you will feel their love instead of disappointment.
Living without expectations does not mean that you allow your partner to walk all over you and treat you like crap. It simply means that you don’t expect them to do certain things in a certain way.
3. Communicate Your Wants, Needs, and Desires in The Moment
The strongest relationships, full of love and understanding, are full of good communication. Your partner cannot read your mind, no matter how much you want them to. Yet chances are you would be disappointed when they do not read you mind (that is where expectations come in.)
Instead of hoping that your partner will figure out how you feel, communicate how you feel in the moment. Instead of being disappointed, hurt, or upset, and letting it fester inside of you, communicate to your partner that they have hurt you.
For example, if your partner forgets your anniversary, and you don’t tell them how hurt you are, then the next time they forget something you will add it to the ‘anniversary moment’. That will make you extra upset about the next incident. However, if you discuss the anniversary issue when it happens, then you will instantly feel better about it and not hold in your reservoir of things that you are upset about.
If you hold in thoughts and feelings, no matter how small they may be, then they can add up over time and cause you to resent your partner. Communicating in the moment allows you to release those thoughts and feelings and move on with the relationship.
4. Show Your Love at All Times
Love can seem to fizzle out as soon as the relationship starts to feel comfortable. I’m not talking about the compassion and caring that you feel for one another. I’m talking about the warm your heart kind of love that makes you see your partner through loving eyes. One day, you may see your partner as a friend, or worse, roommate, and that is when relationship problems can start to occur.
You will never have to bring back the spark in the relationship if it always there! Ensure you do things to keep that spark alive. Do things that you would do in the beginning of the relationship and mix it up with things that only intimate lovers can do.
For example:
  • Send love notes to your partner.
  • Take your partner out on a romantic date.
  • Cook them their favorite meal without a reason.
  • Show them you love them with a hug, kiss or passionate touch.
  • Talk about them in a loving way in front of other people.
There are tons of things you can do to remind your partner about how you feel. Do one thing every day and you will find that the intimate love, that only you two can share, stays strong throughout the years.
5. Trust Your Partner
Suspicion and jealousy can cause you to doubt your partner in many ways. This will cause a rift in the relationship, and most people cannot keep a relationship going strong without trust.
Build a solid foundation of trust with your partner by being honest. Do the things you say you are going to do. Be at the places you say you are going to be. Communicate your feelings when you are upset or hurt. Always be honest with your partner and they will never have anything to not trust about you.
If your trust has been broken in some way, then start building it back or else you will have problems in your relationship. For instance, if your partner lies to you about where they were, and you forgive them, then you need to start building that trust back instead of holding on to that moment. One tiny crack in the relationship can be the cause of its demise, so make sure you fix any cracks quickly.
In the end, if you want to fall in love, and have it last forever, then you need to use the above five tips. They will help you get through tough times and keep your love bond strong and intact.

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